So, here’s where I am honestly at. I finally got into UF after 3 tries in the major that I wasn’t originally intending trusting that God was leading me through all this (which I still am). I am really excited about the unknown and the prospect that God’s plan for me is bigger than the one I originally intended for myself as a high school math teacher; however, it is frustrating beyond belief not to have my life planned out right now. When I was in third grade I had a full life plan to be a writer, and though my plan has changed I have never not had a detailed plan of what I was supposed to do. I feel like God not only wants me to follow his plans as a dual major in Statistics and FYCS, but that he also wants to keep me from planning everything out and have me rely on Him to show me in His time. This is the hardest place I’ve been in yet, but I know his plans are excellent. I think the frustration is especially apparent now that a majority of our community is at home on summer break and not hanging out here and distracting me from overthinking. I don’t know if I’ll ever fully get this part of surrender down in my spiritual life. Some days my prayers are just thanking God for showing me what He has thus far, but other days they are begging God to spell it all out for me. When he does tell me what his plan is, I’m sure I’ll be much more prepared to hear it than I am now. Until then I will continue to learn how to surrender and be patient.
- Haley
